This first post is extremely long. It was my first real email home, sparing the commentary on boring family affairs. So no pictures yet, but it gives a good feel for how I was feeling, and there is something to be said for that.
August 2, 2012
August 2, 2012
Dear family,
I have just started to discover my place here. And my place is simple: I love the people. When I focus on myself in any way, I do not enjoy my stay. My first couple days I was too focused on how I could make myself comfortable and on my needs. But when I am focused on the children, I am so happy. There are some extraordinary children here. I truly love them. They are so so beautiful. I have made many good friends. There is this baby named Akash who is to die for. He has the cutest smile and will reach for me anytime he sees me. There is another baby named Sarania who has to be the most precious thing on the whole planet. She grins whenever you say her name, and puts her arms around my neck and snuggles when I hold her. Cowsie is older, about 12, and she is a dear companion. She is absolutely stunning, and she takes care of me. She translates for the kids who haven’t really learned English, and checks things for lice before they are put in my hair. Deepa is about 14, and she is heavensent. I trust her to not lead me astray. When I ask her the rules, I know she will tell me. She has the sweetest most genuine countenance. Pria is about 16, and she works at the orphanage while she is waiting to get accepted to a higher level school. She is so beautiful. And she always knows where I should be so she points me in directions when I look confused. Mary the Warden, is an absolute dream. She is so good at what she does, and so darn funny. She takes such good care of me. Always making sure I have food and that I like the food and that I am comfortable and happy and everything. She is my India mom. I was sleepy yesterday and laid down on the ground in her little area and she stroked my arm til I fell asleep. I love that all the women here touch. I wish it was more that way in the states. When you walk with a lady, you hold hands or have your arms around each other. Mary and I always do. I do with Mariama as well. She laughs every time I say her name, which leads me to believe I am saying it wrong, but I ask, and she says it is right. I’m hoping she is just giggly. She is another faculty, who seems to have been put in charge of me to make sure I don’t make too many mistakes. Poor woman. But she is so warm and lovely and kind. There is a boy about 13 named Carte who is so sweet. Totally handsome but so pure and good. There is a boy named Mutu who is about 10 who is so cute and sweet you just want to melt every time you see him. Jaya is about 8 and she has an African look to her. She always wants to carry my backpack. Oh there is a special place in my heart for her. And for Zen. She looks like Jaya, both beautiful, and acts like her too. They both have this sweet adoration that makes it impossible not to kiss them every time you look at them. I could talk about the kids all day.
I have started teaching dance. I sweat so much as it is, but then teaching dance on top of it. Ew. There are flies swarming me for my awful scent. Even the Carters would be proud of these pit stains. The kids are so sweet though. Even right now, I told them I would go email my family, and they said, “Here! Stay here!” So I am surrounded by little girls. And I am sweating. None of the Indians sweat. I’m not sure how that works. Anyway, when they see you sweat, they blow on your face, or fan you with something, or wipe it off with their hands. They are so aware of the needs of others. So I have absolutely no need to focus on my needs, because I am surrounded by people who are focused on my needs. They were doing my hair yesterday (don’t worry, Mom - it was with my comb) and I didn’t have a hair clip for the flowers they wanted to put in. So one girl says a few Tamil syllables, and all the girls band together, and there is a hair clip passed up from the crowd. Cowsie checks it for lice before putting it in my hair. Something about having my hair brushed was so comforting. Another very comforting thing when I was getting used to this: clouds. Clouds are clouds everywhere. Isn’t that wonderful? No matter where I go, there will be a sky. It’s like the gospel. There were very few things that were familiar. There for the first couple days, it was the gospel that was familiar. Scriptures and prayer were familiar. I have never felt the need to cling to those things even harder for familiarity’s sake before now. And I am so grateful that the main thing in my life will always be there and will always be familiar to me if I stick to it.
Oh right, teaching. I will also teach seminary and English club, and I am so excited about those. But they want me to focus on the dance. They want me to come up with a musical to present. We need to come up with something they can show others that will encourage help. This is such a good organization. The children are well taken care of, and have a good understanding of life. But they would love more sponsors, and would even love more young people to come the way Rachel or I did. One woman who is one of the members of the board of trustees, Sudha, would like me to come up with a musical type performance where the kids can showcase for people when they visit, and we can record it and show it to people. She would like it to motivate help in whatever way it makes most sense to people. She was thinking when you wish upon a star could be a song in it. I don't think they are looking for a certain length. But maybe around like three songs? I need help.
The tender mercies are too many to count. They do this thing to show affection called mutem where they grab your cheek with all five fingers, then with all five fingers closed together they kiss their fingers. That didn’t make much sense, but it is the cutest thing. They show so much love here. They are always hanging on me and holding my hands everywhere I go. I ended up with quite the bouquet this morning. The younger girls put flowers in my hair, and the older girls have to come take it out because it attracts lice. There are times that you will be sitting with some kids, and one kid will hold your face for a while. It just makes you want to cry. I taught some girls beautiful in sign language because I wanted to do it to them, and they immediately turned it on me before I even had the chance to do it to them first. These girls are the older girls, like fifteen, and they feel like my peers. I love it. I taught them dance today, and it was so fun. They were cracking me up. All they wanted to learn was how to “shake it” and how to move their hips. Then we got chatting, which was totally necessary because I had been dancing the whole day (dancing in India is like Bikram zumba). They were talking about their boyfriends (so darling) and they asked about mine. I said that I didn’t have one, and they all looked at me in shock. At first I felt like a loser, but then Vigi (I love Vigi – she looks and acts like cousin Elise) said “But you are so beautiful!” And they all bobbled their heads in agreement. They are just so good at showing love and so willing to show it. Love and compliments are not in short supply.
I am starting a “take home” list. That is, things I will do differently because of my time here. EFY did something to my brain. Just a few: I will make each person know that they are loved and worthwhile. I will remember the unimportance of things, but the importance of giving things. I will remember and use names - names matter. The way I study my scriptures here I will take home with me. It is like I depend on them wholly and I have this hunger for them that I have never experienced like this.
Three more weeks will not be enough.
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