Independence Day minus the fireworks - Days 16 and 17

August 15 and 16

Today is Independence Day for India!  It is the 65^th Independence day since their liberty from British rule.  I saw some great skits about that – luckily it is clear who is playing Ghandi (the one wearing a manskirt and is walking in a hobbly manner), or else it would have been very confusing.  We celebrated by having a day off, by putting on a program, and by eating special food.  We got poori for breakfast!  It’s like, a sort of fried, thin but soft carbohydrate.  Painted a clear picture, I imagine.  And this sweet pink stuff and a green bean/carrot mixture as side dishes for lunch, and my favorite to go along with dinner – this chipish thing that’s made of lentils.  Each kid got a piece of cake and candy (they call any kind of candy chocolate here) and a biscuit (cookie) from Chandra – the Director’s wife.  Have I talked about her?  I love her so much.  She really runs a lot of the show, and she spends her days working hard with the special children, using her beautiful artistic ability to teach them.  She is so kind and genuinely good-hearted.  Anyway, the program was great.  The kids put a lot of time and effort into showing a lot of dances and skits and speeches and marches and the like.  They had me sit in a place of honor which is weird for me, but it was fun because there was a great view.  Magesh and Mutu (both 8ish) were to die for in their little dance involving pom-poms.  Some of the girls are really fabulous dancers, and of course they looked gorgeous to boot.  It was so fun to see them get all dressed up – girls, no matter the age, have an innate love of getting dressed up.    They were all beaming.  They loved getting me dressed up too.  I wore a sari for the first time today.  And the girls did my make-up and hair and put a bindi and a chain (necklace) on me.  I felt like an Indian princess.  But as it turns out, saris are heavy and awkward and freaking hot and impossible to dance in.  So, never again, needless to say.  The special children and adults did a dance that was SO cute!  Some of them really have a love and a talent even for dancing.  But they do not like choreography.  They like to move to the music, as freestyle as it gets.  I am totally behind that. 

There are some incredible special adults that are here.  They are so so sweet.  They all are so friendly and kind and warm and talk to me even though I can never respond to them because I know like ten tamil words.  One of them loves to show off for me.  He pops his collar when he walks by me, and starts dancing.  He is very MJ-esque in his moves.  So of course I am more than impressed.  There is another, Ratesh, who is the sweetest thing ever.  His face lights up when he sees me and he walks over to me and makes sure that everything is ok with me.  He will turn on the light or open the door if I look really sweaty or just take care of whatever I need.  I, in turn, light up whenever I see them.  One of them I always hope I will be able to see.  He has a giant smile and is always bobbling his head.   He is so handsome and very respectful of his teachers.  There is another who just says hi to me over and over again.  He will come see me on the playground when I am holding a baby and say hi over and over again to the baby too.  I will sit in the hall of the special school instead of the other school and write in my journal or on here when I am not teaching and the kids are in school.  One, because it is a lot quieter and I am less of a distraction, and two, because it is my time to see them.  Whenever I do come sit here, I have a secret hope that the special kids and adults will ditch whatever they are supposed to be doing and come find me.  Many have started hugging me goodnight – you know, those very sweet, very looooong hugs.  I get to sit with a lot of them while I write on here or in my journal.  They love seeing photos or watching me type.  There is something special about people who already have a spot in the Celestial Kingdom.  If you think about it, the list of people who also have a spot in the Celestial Kingdom on the earth at the moment consists of apostles and these people.  Maybe that’s why we call them special.

It took me a week to fully get over the homesickness (who knew that would be such a problem).  And it only took one more week for everything to feel normal.  But all of a sudden, everything feels extremely normal.  Like I love the food, and I am no longer concerned about breaking social norms and I feel like the kids are mine to the point of plotting ways to get them safely to America via suitcase.  I knew I would fall in love with them, but I had no idea what it would really feel like.  I know I talk about Akash a lot, but I can’t help it – he is my best little buddy.  I love the relationship I have with him.  Yes, I am saying that about a two-year-old whom I have absolutely no common language with.  I would be so happy to have a child like him; He is easy-going, outgoing, loving, independent, and spunky.  Today he came over to my place of honor and sat on my lap for part of the program.  He played with my bandana I had been using to wipe my sweat while saying a lot of things I couldn’t understand.  Apparently he was discussing to himself his plans of making the bandana into a kite that he would fly really high in the sky and maybe let go of it if it wanted to go to space.  Then tonight when I was holding him in the dorm, he immediately gripped me around my neck and only let go to kiss both my cheeks, my forehead, and my nose.  Mom, you know how you said you thought he was really cute in the picture?  Do you also think he would be really cute on a bed in our house? J  Just kidding, he enjoys his life here.  But shoot dang, I love him.  I realized that saying bye to him was going to be as hard as it is to say goodbye to my nephew, except that I have never had to say goodbye to my nephew for an indefinite period of time.  It’s easier with the older kids I am in love with because I can email them and save up for plane tickets for them so they can fulfill their dreams of coming to BYU.  But then the little ones you can’t stay in touch with, especially since the relationship you have with them consists entirely of holding them and playing with them and blowing raspberries on their tummies.  Tonight Meetalesh and I had tickle fight for the books.  Oh, Meetalesh!  Oh shoot, I can’t think about having to say bye to him.  I can’t.  The only solution is bringing them back with me.  Any ideas besides stealing an airplane?  I thought through that already, and it would just get too terrorist, too fast. 

I had a mini dance party in the boys dorm tonight.  Magesh is the best awkward dancer I’ve ever seen.  I was completely awestruck.  I really have to record some of the dancing these kids do.  There are few things I think I enjoy more than that.  I am starting to realize that love can come in the form of fun.  In fact, love and fun, my two favorite things, are much more partners than they are enemies. 

Take home:  I will remember that I am part of the equation in me doing the Lord’s work – He made me special, and He loves who I am, and the person I am can do the things He needs done.  I will remember that having fun is a very crucial part of feeling loved (I should’ve taken that home from EFY).  I will keep having dance parties because dancing your heart out is a way to connect with anyone.  I will remember that love takes time, but with time, you can and will love anyone you truly desire to.