Tamil lessons and tender mercies. Days 4, 5, and 6.

August 3-5, 2012

I must record my lunch experience from Saturday.  What a roller coaster.  A group of aspiring speech pathologists were visiting to hear from the director, Dr. Prasad, so there was a fancy lunch prepared for them.  The directors treat me special, which is totally weird to me.  They had me come eat with them.  This was one of the few times I was uncomfortable.  I felt so out of place being served a fancy lunch while the people I usually ate with were serving it.  I started eating, and realized I had no idea how I was supposed to eat any of it.  There was yogurt, and a pile of four different sauces, and rice, this vegetable mixture, and chapatti on this banana leaf.  I looked around, started mixing with my hands, and began eating.  I know I was committing faux-pa after faux-pa.  I am practiced at eating with my hands, but not eating yogurt with my hands.  At one point, someone the director called my name, and as I looked up, vegetable feel out of mouth and onto my chapatti, where I’m sure chewed up vegetable does not belong.  I just started laughing.  What else is there to do?  I wished someone had been there to see all of it so I had someone to laugh with.  To make me feel better, they asked me if I wanted more rice.  I accidentally headbobbled instead of saying no.  I got a lot more rice.  So, very full, I folded up my leaf and began cleaning the tables until it was clear that I was doing more harm than good.  I left, knowing I had just had one of those special experiences you need to remember for future generations.

Did you know that it is so hot here this summer that King Cobras are starting to die off?  Just thought you’d be interested to know that. 

I have already learned so much from Mary.  I learning some tamil words from her (“tangachi” means little sister, “tambi” means little brother, “akkah” means big sister, “annah” means big brother, “ammah” means mom, “appah” means dad, “nandri” means thank you, and “nanunanassikiran” means I love you, “mutem” means kiss, “muku” means nose, “vanga” means come) you know, the basics.  But I am learning most by the way she gives her life for others.  She works so hard, and she received absolutely nothing for it.  She is constantly doing things for others.  Like, I think the only thing she does for herself in a day is shower.  She goes to bed at 10pm, wakes up at 4:50 am, and every single one of those seconds is spent working for the kids.  She keeps them in line, but will grab a baby out of the line to nuzzle their arm.  I love this woman so so much.

Here is the kid description paragraph.  Longest part, but it is my favorite part.  Friday night I went to the boy’s dorm.  I hadn’t spent as much time with the boys as with the girls up to that point.  But now all I want to do is hang out with the boys.  The kids all think I am pro at sign language now, so they were asking how to say cute girl.  I taught them, and they kept pointing at me and doing it, trying to be sneaky.  I so have a crush on all of them.  They told me they knew something, and it was how to say “I love you” in sign language.  I say that to them all the time in that way.  Magesh (7? - pictured) is so darling.  He holds up his hands and makes them into a heart and looks through it at me.  He stands directly in front of me wherever I am and ignores all the ruckus around him to very endearingly hang on my every word.  Today when I went to the boy’s dorm, I was kind of overwhelmed by everyone tugging on me, and I looked over at him sitting quietly by my side.  He said very quietly, “I love you so much.”  Tender mercy to the extreme.  I had to fight back tears with everything I had.  Tears make everyone uncomfortable here.  We know that’s no good for me.  Karthi (13?) is wonderful.  He is so hungry to learn when he comes to dance, and always is listening so intently when I talk.  He will stand in the back of the group that is surrounding me and silently listen to me sing or peek over everyone’s heads to look at me.  He wrote me the sweetest note on Saturday.  Mikalesh (4? - pictured) is sooooooo cute.  Seriously, heartmeltingly cute.  Honest (8? - pictured) is so good.  He is a little bit shy, and mostly plays with his little sister who is also pretty shy.  They are so darling, and just so good!  I mean, how sweet is it that they play together all the time?  When a girl was doing my hair, he grabbed his sister, and sat on the edge of the bench.  I took his hand and his sister’s hand and they didn’t move from that spot the whole time.  He just stroked my hand.  Jaren (6? - pictured) could be the darn tootenest cutest thing ever.  His eyes  are huge, as are his cheeks.  He looks at me with this coy smile til I say his name and smile back.  Ragi (12?) is so funny.  He is such a jokester, but the best kind of jokester.  He is smiling NON-STOP.  It’s impressive how much he smiles.  And his smile takes up his whole face.  He gave me a bracelet last night.  Shiva (8? - pictured) is so darling.  He is just, so cute!  He grabs my hand when I walk and looks at me with these puppy dog eyes that are just so hungry for love.  He is so happy and warm.  He stays in the back until I see him and tell him to come sit by me.  Goku (8? - pictured) is so sweet.  He is totally silent, but shyly smiles every time I get really excited to see him.  Naveen (13? - pictured) has these dimples that make you want to squeeze him.  He is so genuine.  Just the sweetest, most un-assuming boy ever.  I am becoming good friends with him.  Oh how I love these boys!  I am struggling to find a way to show the boys my love for them adequately.  There are some lines in the Indian culture that I know I am totally already crossing with them, but they are so hungry for love!  I wish I would have brought some special things for me to give boys.  I give my earrings to the girls every day, but I brought nothing the boys would be interested in.  But I will show in every other way I can think of. 

Honest is in the front, and Jaren is smiling in the back

Naveen is on the left with the giant smile.  And the boy sitting is Ramen. 

These are the smaller boys.  Please notice Mikalesh doing karate in the corner.  Oh goodness he is cute.

Goku has his head turned on the far left, and Magesh is the one who barely got his sweet face into the picture on the bottem left.  Shiva is second to the right.

Seminary.  I am so out-of-my-mind excited that I get to teach seminary.  These kids are so wonderful.  There are a fair amount of kids who are so attentive and hang on my every word, which is so nice for any teacher to have.  They are shy to share, but I think that will get better.  The comments that have been shared have been so wonderful.  When we were talking about faith, I asked what it meant to them.  Usually, one person will pretty much quote Alma 32:21, and that’s the end of it.  But there were like four very different and really fantastic thoughts.  I have discovered a new love within the last six weeks, and it is teaching.  After the class, we all just hang out until an adult who isn’t a hooligan tells everyone to go study.  I think this time, seminary and hanging out after, will be some of my favorite time. 

There are members here who are so incredible.  A boy of 16 named Mani (pictured below) has impressed me so much.  He was asking me so many questions about temples and missions and patriarchal blessings.  He wants a patriarchal blessing, but doesn’t know much about them or how to get one.  I don’t know how he would either.  There has to be a way, right?  I will look into it.  And he told me about how he is praying to be brave enough to share the gospel with his friends, even though he could get in trouble for it at school (he goes to a different, older school, and rides his bicycle back to Pathway to eat and sleep).  And that he has been able to share with friends.  It is so neat to see so much desire in a young man.  He is hungry for more.  What a great reminder to be more grateful for all the things, even in the gospel, I have taken for granted or felt entitled to.  I never have thought about people who really don’t know how to find a patriarch.  He spent a while being helped with his tithing while other kids were catching up with friends they hadn’t seen for a while.  I just think his faith is so beautiful.

These two beauties are Mani and Monisha listening to EFY music on my Ipod on the way to Chennai for church.

What an enormous blessing church was to me.  Because it was fast Sunday, we went to the church in Chennai and attended the service there.  It was such a relief to be able to go to Church there and partake of the Sacrament.  I felt all anxiety leave while I was in that building, and not just because it had the first air-conditioning I felt in a week.  A week?  Oh, it feels much longer than that.  Anyway, the church is the church everywhere.  We sang “I Know That My Redeemer Lives” and “I Stand All Amazed.”  My Savior truly silences all fears and wipes away my tears.  And I believe the main confusion we have in this life is that Christ would really give us His life, not just in dying for us, but in living every moment for us.  It is incredible, and it’s understandable and good that we be amazed by it.  But the problem lies in being so amazed that we deem it unbelievable.  It is true, I promise it is.  This experience has shown it to me in new ways, and I know it now even more than before.

Take home: I will not take the sacrament for granted.   I will seek Christ in my actions.  I will obtain my errand from the Lord every day.  I will remember to just work for the boss, and not try to be the boss.  I will remember the importance of drinking tons of water, and be more grateful when the water is cold.

Thanks for sticking with me.

Nanunanassikiran. 

Davi